Soulmate Wanted
(no nutcases, please)

Last novel finished: Clan of the Cave Bear. Last non-fiction book read: A Stillness at Appomattox (I'm a Civil War buff). When not bartending I practice firedancing/martial arts, herbology, read, watch tv, work on my art projects, internet mail order business, publishing, and gardening. One tattoo, two pierced ears. Never married, no kids.

Movies: Beauty and the Beast (Cocteau), Teomeo and Juliet, Brother From Anorher Planet, Buster Keaton, spaghetti westerns, old kung fu movies, Mr. Herlot movies, Fritz Lang, Fellini, Kubrick, Bunuel, Welles. b/w horror, Monty Python, Brazil, etc.

Let's go to flea markets and swap meets, thrift stores, and the occasional computer or gun show. Let's go to drum circles. Let's picnic at the beach and on each other's bellies. Let's learn firedance routines, put a troupe together, and travel like gypsies, performing whenever possible. Let's go to Burning Man every year and to the Renn faire every other year (or three). Let's stay up late and sleep in every day. And then climb up on the roof for breakfast mimosas overlooking the beach. Let's bartend at rock concerts and sell herbs and artwork. Let's go on road trips and pull over whenever we want to take pictures. Let's fast for a day then pig out on all you can eat Chinese food. And then do the same at the all you can eat crab legs place. Let's get massages together, do mutual paintings, murals, and gardens. Let me rub hot massage oil onto your feet and worship the ground they walk on. Let's take repeated road trips to San Francisco until we decide to move there.

Current pastime: eating Guatemalan insanity peppers and sending filthy love poems to pretty little cam girls.
No, really: I am producing a CD of music to fire dance to. My three drummers and I had a recording session. I used to drum in a trance band called Mothra. Before that I drummed in a punk rock band, No Consensus.

Writers: Poe, Shakespeare, Brecht, Orwell, Philip Dick, Barry Malzberg, Slanislav Lem, Italo Calvino, Borges, Mark Twain, Noam Chomsky, Karl Marx.

Let's be monogamous and have sex often. Let's practice safe sex until we get it right. I'm not into SM, but a little B&D is okay. I love foreplay. I like kissing. I like holding hands. I don't want to have children; I don't want to get married. No bored housewives or otherwise married women. Nobody looking for hot chat or material for their "first erotic story." Nobody pretending to be a "persona" of themselves. No alien abductees. No nutcases, please.

Turn off's: liers, phonies, cowards, whiney, vascillating, two-faced people who can't make up their minds and don't know what they want, and look for guys to make decisions for them and then bail out of all responsibility. Equally turned off by both ignorance and holier-than-thou attitudes. No Republicans. No white supremacists, please (that's all there are here in the Third Reich of Ventura County).

Oh, and no husband-and-wife con job teams looking to bilk lonely guys out of airfare.
Professor me. I wasted the best years of my life teaching college. I taught at the University of California at Santa Barbara and at California State Dominguez Hills. I taught sociology and criminology. I also lectured on drug use, rape prevention, the political theories of anarchism, Marxism, and the sociology of art and rock and roll. I was out to save the world. It was a waste of time to have both gone to and taught college.

My backyard at my house in Upland. A great place.

More about me.Email to Phil "Fear" Heiple.

Here's a shot of me on television. I hosted an alternative video show on cable television in Santa Barbara for three years. Mainly goth and punk videos with original animation and shorts of my own making. I have a huge collection of music videos. Stuff never seen on MTV. Stuff like Skinny Puppy, Ministry, Siouxsie, Dead Kennedys, Smiths, Depeche Mode, KMFDM, and more. Great for watching on a rainy night.

I've been working on my abs. I painted the reproduction on the wall.

More photos of me with my shirt off!